1) Why did you decide to adopt rather than having your own children first?
A: Both of my children are my own. Unless you happen to know otherwise, in which case please let me know who's "own" they are. Much appreciated.
2) That's how it always happen, you adopt and then BAM you're pregnant with a real child! Which fertility treatment did you use?
A: Well, both of my children are real. We keep the plastic ones in the basement near the septic output. As for fertility treatments, that term is new to me - would you mind elaborating? And while you're at it, please email me a high resolution file picture of your bare ass to post in the masthead of my blog. Thanks.
3) How can you afford all of this? Did you hit the lottery or are you a trust fund baby?
A: Excuse me while I change my panties, you just made me piddle a little bit from laughter. And to answer directly, No and No. I prefer to think of it as well designed allocation of funds. AKA, I wear Old Navy skirts and don't tithe. Fingers crossed those prayers my mom has been saying for me over the years hold up in the court of the pearly gates one day. We'll bring our passports just in case.